Searching.

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

Psalm 139:23-24

I’m wrestling.

I have been struggling with a situation, and it seems as though I continue to butt up against the same brick wall, over and over.

This morning, as I sat with my coffee and my Bible, I was confronted with the truth in these words. The verses have been framed on my wall for months, if not years, and I look past them daily; my eyes bouncing over them, not stopping to let the weight of their meaning seep into my soul.

But today.

Search me, God.

Bring Your holy conviction to the areas where it is needed.

You know my heart.

Better than I know myself.

Test me, and my anxious thoughts.

Help me to silence my futile worrying so that Your voice can be heard.

Reveal the areas in my heart that are offensive to You.

Like my lack of trust.

My efforts to run my own life.

My desire to be in control.

My dissatisfaction with Your timing.

Lead me in the ways of everlasting life.

Your plans for me are perfect.

And only Your will is going to bring me satisfaction and peace.

Search me.

And the walls come down.